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Facebreaker: Infected

13/10/10 || InquisitorGeneralis

Solid Swedish death metal bands are a dime a dozen. I hear they pass them out late at night in Stockholm along with those shrimp-salad/mashed potato burrito thingies I saw on television. I actually really want one of those so if someone could please mail one to me at the following address I would be forever grateful:

Mr. Inquisitorgeneralis Merriweather
666 Gofuckyourself Boulevard
Bodymore Murderland, The United States of World War Victory 21666

On with the breaking of the faces already. Here we have some seriously heavy, although wholly unoriginal, mid-paced death metal done by the people (Swedes) who perfected the sound. Facebreaker may not know how to do anything new, but they can certainly pound your bitch ass with some heavy grooves. This, I cannot deny. For an example of this, check out the title track which is an ass-shredding beast. Facebreaker know how to bring the pain, but it is the slight taste of melody in “Infected” (the song) that sets it apart from most of the other tracks on here. If Facialsplatter could just add some variety and creativity to their certifiably heavy tunes they could be a real force in the death metal scene. “Mankind under siege” is another great song that mixes things up a bit. There are not poor tracks on here, but everything else just kind of runs together.

Let me put this in terms that some of you may understand… if you have ever had the pleasure of making sweet love to a lady. Or in Sly’s case been on the receiving end of a metalhead’s mighty flesh-hammer. Bands like Death and Opeth are the musical equivalent of a three-hour tantric sex marathon that results in fifteen orgasms achieved through the use of fifteen different positions. There is variety, excitement, and shifts between the extreme and the soft. Facebreaker, on the other hand are more like what I call Ape Sex. Ape Sex is almost always performed while piss-drunk off of your ass on cheap beer and cheaper whiskey. During Ape Sex, the male chimp attempts to ram his little ape into the female’s jungle canopy as fast as possible, as hard as possible, and as many times as possible before passing out from exhaustion and alcohol poisoning.

That’s Facebreaker. Enjoyable, but you cannot do it all of the time. Either you, your ears, or your she-ape’s poontang will just be worn and torn the fuck out.

If you like full-force death metal bands like Paganizer, Nominom, Deicide, and Grave, Facebreaker is your type of shit. These days, however, I am looking for a bit more from my death metal than just sheer brutality and aggression. Don’t get me wrong, I like “Infected” and from what I have heard from earlier material this is Facebreaker’s best offering yet. As I said before, if Facebreaker can find some way to distance themselves from the other 5,000,000 Swedeath bands out there they could really be something special. The musicianship, production, and sound are all there so the score ain’t too shabby. However, if another Facebreaker record in the future come across my desk and sounds just like this it will be a letdown. But for now, get hammered and let your little gorilla pound some vagina. It could be worse.

Information
Released: 2010
Label: Cyclone Empire
Website: www.facebreaker.com
Band
Roberth “Robban” Karlsson: vocals
Janne Ivarsson: guitar
Mika Lagrén: guitar
Jonas Magnusson: bass, backing vocals
Mikael “Kniven” Wassholm: drums

Tracklist
01. Creeping Flesh
02. Cannibalistic
03. Torn To Shreds
04. Epidemic
05. The Return
06. Bloodshed
07. Mankind Under Siege
08. Waiting For The Pain
09. Into The Pit
10. Bloodthirst
11. Reanimating The Dead
12. Infected

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