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Class 6(66)
Boston: Boston
05/01/11 || InquisitorGeneralis
Introduction
Boston’s self-titled debut fucking rocks. May you be raped by a thousand unemployed Swedish cheesemakers if you disagree! Back in 1976 this record hit the rock scene like my seven-pound cock dick hit Bigboi’s momma in the face this morning. Boston’s sound was unique and seeing as they sold seventeen million copies of “Boston” I’d say a few people liked it. If you are questioning the metalness of the record all you need to do is listen to the fantastic dual-guitar harmonies that can be found throughout this classic and realize that most modern metal guitarists are still ripping Boston off in the guitar department.
This is not just a classic, it is one of the best records ever fucking made in any genre. Period. Not that any other genres besides metal and rock-leading-to-metal count for shit. But still, “Boston” is absolute funbags. Like Pam Anderson circa 1993 funbags. I am going to say things like “one of the best” and “best ever” and “perfect” a lot in this review so get ready for some serious “Boston” tea-bagging here as I rap my lips all over this classic-rock gem’s cajones.
Songwriting
10. Perfect, you know why? Besides these songs are timeless and still sound fresh and original almost thirty years later. A challenge any rock or hard rock band out there to write something even 1/1000 as awesome as “Foreplay/longtime” or “Smokin’”. There is a reason you still hear “More than a feeling” on a regular basis on rock radio; it is one of the most memorable, well-done rock songs ever. The beginning of “Foreplay/longtime” still holds up as one of the intros to ever get a song started.
Even the ballad’s on here like “Let me take you home tonight” and “Hitch a ride” dominate and pretty much set the standard for the chart-busting cheese that hair metal bands would put out almost ten years later. Listen to the organ/guitar solo and breakdown on “Smokin”, it fucken rules. No two tracks sound exactly alike on “Boston”; each one is memorable and distinct. You can hear any of these songs on regular classic rock radio rotation. Can you honestly saw that about any other record besides Led Zeppelin’s debut or “Zoso”? I think not.
Production
10. “Boston” sounds fantastic. What else do I need to say? Obviously there was a lot of studio work done here, especially on the layered guitars and vocals. Each instrument is clear and distinct. I can only imagine how great his record sounded on the system in a ’76 Monte Carlo. Honestly, I cannot point out any flaws in the production whatsoever.
Guitars
1,000. You will be hard pressed to find a rock album with better sounding and performed guitars than those on “Boston”. Perfect riffs are a dime and dozen; the iconic main line of “More than a feeling”, the bluesy twang of “Smokin’”, and the upbeat swing of “Rock & roll band” are all great examples of this. The solo that stars off “Long time” still amazes me every time. If you take the heavy riffs that were being done at the same time and combine them with the harmonies and heavier melodies on “Boston” you pretty much get the blueprint for most metal these days. I challenge you to find an album that has more of an influence on guitar playing than this.
Vocals
9. Group harmonic perfection deluxe. Brad Delp, who unfortunately gave himself the gas chamber treatment a few years ago, was a fantastic singer who could hit the high notes and not annoy the shit out of you. His vocals were soulful and emotional but not cheesy or corny in the extreme. Now, about those outfits…
Bass
9. It lists Fran Sheehan as playing bass as well as band leader Tom Scholz. Seeing as Scholz seems a bit possessive about Boston, I am guessing he did most of the leg work. The bass is good and goes along perfect with the guitar awesomeness that smothers “Boston” like Daemo’s momma’s ham hocks smothered my face last Saturday night.
Drums
8. Sib “Jewfro” Hasabian takes care of business behind the kit. While not unleashing gravity blasts or D-beats, Sib Vicious maintains a steady beat and groove. His absence from Boston’s later records (he left the group after 1978’s “Don’t Look Back”) is noticeable. Sib’s fills and transitions are especially cool and really help add some muscle to the excellent work being done by the guitar players up front.
Lyrics 9. Want some awesome double entrendres, check these out…
We’re cooking tonight,
Just keep on toking! Smokin’,
Smokin’, smokin’
I feel alright, mama,
I’m not joking!
I have a feeling they are talking about smoking weed here, just saying. Anyway, most of the stuff on here is about the ladies, rockin’ and rollin’, and hittin’ the road. Hey, it was the 70’s folks; people had not started writing songs about worshipping Satan and exhuming dead bodies. Do you want to get laid? Of course you do, so go get some girl drunk and/or high and play “Let me take you home tonight”. She will not be able to resist…or stay conscious.
Cover
10. Oh snap, here come the guitar spaceships from Dimension X! Seriously, this is one of the best album covers in the history of rock and established the guitar-spaceship as Boston’s signature image. It still stands out today.
Logo
8. Fancy writing and big letters stamped on the back of a guitar-shaped UFO. Score.
Booklet
N/A. I lost this fucker a long time ago. I have a remastered edition of the record so I am sure there were some pictures and comments. Or not. Who the fuck cares?
Overall and Ending Rant
Please, please try and explain to me why “Boston” is not a perfect record! The songs, the talent, the playing, the production…it is all tip-fucking-top. The roots of metal guitar playing are certainly being sowed here. As I said before, each song on here is a bonafide hit but still legitimately rockin’. Except for maybe “Let me take you home tonight” but hey, it was the late 70’s so a little cheese is acceptable. Until “Appetite for Destruction” was injected into rock’s veins this was the greatest selling debut record ever. 17,000,000 albums sold is nothing to laugh at. No aspect of this record is less than spectacular; the songwriting, the talent, and the production are all perfect or really fucking close.
Honestly, you could say this is the greatest rock album ever made. It is up there with all the other greats. Boston suffers because they only made one good record after this while their contemporaries had a much more prolific output. However, I truly think that “Boston” can stand up against any single record put out by Led Zeppelin, The Who, Lynyrd Skynryd, AC/DC, or any other classic rock band that came to prominence during the arena days of the 1970’s.
Well fuckos, it’s been a really long review.
K doesn’t wait for me, he keeps on hatin’.
There’s cold beer, and bitches that await me
I’ve got to keep on chasing that dream, here at Global D
- Information
- Released: 1976
- Label: Epic
- Website: www.bandboston.com
- Band
- Brad Delp: vocals, guitar
- Tom Scholz: electric guitars, acoustic guitars, clavinet, organ, bass guitar
- Barry Goudreau: electric guitars
- Fran Sheehan: bass guitar
- Sib Hashian: drums
- Tracklist
- 01. More Than a Feelin
- 02. Peace of Mind
- 03. Foreplay/Long Time
- 04. Rock & Roll Band
- 05. Smokin’
- 06. Hitch a Ride
- 07. Something About You
- 08. Let Me Take You Home Tonight
