### Reece: Universal language

#### 24/08/09 || Kampfar

Even if David Reece happen to be tenfolds as cool as the music he make – and I really doubt him to be anything more than a waste of sperm on every last account there is – he still deserves to be named David Cuntcheese. And, have his band re-christened according to his brilliant new surname. If you care, and I hope you don’t, this idiot David once upon a time did vocals for Accept. Just remembered, I fucking hate Accept, and also Ludo, the latter so ugly a shotgun blast to the face would, without a doubt, improve his looks by at least 50%. In other words: go die ya fat, ugly midget fuck.

And, fuck all bands Mr. Cuntcheese ever participated in too. Yep, that includes you, Stolen Rose, the last mentioned a Swedish shit orchestra I shall never hear but hopefully someday mutilate to hell by the use of gardentools and chainsaws.

As you may have notice, you utter dildo, me takes “Universal language” as a downright insult. Why? Well, some cuntbag related to this band obviously decided shipping “heavy” metal our way was a wise thing to do. To do or not do, Milkshakespear once said, “Universal language” a definite not to do. A fucking text-book example even.

I’ve listened to this shitfest only once and never again. Seriously, I don’t have any time to waste on crap at times visiting Mr. Big territory. Nor do any of our readers. If the latter doesn’t ring true, I suggest the suicide solution for some of those readers.

Do it quick, do it now!

This album has been made circa 4374 times by now, “Universal language” nothing but a pathetic “heavy” metal cliché, so fuck Cuntcheese but never lick ‘em.

- Information
- Released: 2009
- Label: yeah, surprisingly so.
- Website: if it exists, I’m sure it looks like shit.
- Band
- Dildo 1: vocals
- Dildo 2: guitar
- Dildo 3: bass
- Dildo 4: drums

- Tracklist
- 01. Before I die (Kampfar will punch me in the cunt)
- 02. All the way (Kampfar thought we were gay)
- 03. Flying close to the flame (one oh so lame)
- 04. Fantasy man (yes, we are utter homos)
- 05. The river (of spunk we love)
- 06. I’ll remember you (for as long as my ass hurts)
- 07. Rescue me (and spray me in the face while at it)
- 08. Once in a lifetime (I’d fuck a woman. Max)
- 09. We were alive (whilst on speed in that gay-parade of yore)
- 10. Flesh and blood (and cum)
- 11. Queens of my dreams (happens to be a she-male)
- 12. Yellow (is the color of dirty piss)