### Northland: Northland

#### 06/09/10 || revenant

Saturday, 6.10pm Well, there goes the wife, off to work. What shall I do with myself now? Hmmm, been a couple of days since I last logged into GD, let’s see what’s happening. Smalley’s copping shit from K, nothing unusual there. Lumberjack’s laid down some cracking one liners; I always enjoy reading his posts. What’s this? Aaarrggghh, more label sends, and a couple have been left unclaimed for a few days now. K’s already getting his panties tied in knots over that, time to bite the bullet and claim one.

Wait, what’s this? Northland, a melodic viking metal band? Fucking sweet, these guys could be the next Amon Amarth. I wonder why no one else has claimed them. Never mind that, make the claim and cross the fingers.

Saturday, 6.20pm Right, we’re ready to go. A quick run through the checklist: Beer – check, horned helmet – check, battle axe – check, beard – erm… let’s consider it a work in progress. OK, now I’m vikinged up, let’s hit play. Some wind sound effect. Drumming kicks in. Nice atmospheric start here. Building nicely. Some flutes kick in, but it’s still all good, this is just an intro track. Here we go, into the main track now.

…

Shit. My horns droop. My beard wilts. The old “mislabelled label send” syndrome has struck again. I’m listening to folk metal. Oh boy, this is going to be a rough ride. No wonder nobody claimed this one.

Saturday, 6.22pm I want to hit the stop button. These keyboard and violin melodies are already giving me the shits. This stuff is appalling. The growled vocals we sub-par, now there is clean singing and it’s even worse. OK, let’s not give up hope just yet, maybe things will improve with the next track.

Saturday, 6.26pm Things don’t improve with the next track. It seems this band’s thing is putting growled vocals and heavy guitars behind stupid fucking melodies. The drumming and guitar work are fine, but these melodies are really killing it. It sounds like the soundtrack to “Braveheart”. With music like this you’ll either love it or loathe it. I’m in that latter category.

Saturday, 6.31pm What’s this? A German drinking song? Hahahahaha, now this cheers me up somewhat, mainly because I’m laughing at how silly this song is. “The Old Town’s Inn” eh? Well this track is the highlight so far. While on the topic of drinking, it’s time to go back to the fridge for another. Wait, was that burp at the end of the track me or on the CD?

Saturday, 6.41pm These melodies are really digging at my sanity now. I sure hope none of them get stuck in my head, the last thing I want is to find myself whistling this bullshit. I wonder what are you supposed to do to this music: headbang or dance a jig?

Saturday, 6.49pm Female vocals. I should have seen that coming. These aren’t too good either, but not quite as bad as the clean male vocals. The lyrics are about some journey being over. Are the taunting me? My journey sure as shit isn’t over, two tracks to go.

Saturday, 6.56pm Silence at last. It’s beautiful. I look back at the description: “Spanish Viking Metal”. Spanish vikings? Looks like I missed the obvious clue there.

Monday, 8.20am It’s time to give this album another listen while on my way to work. I prefer to go through an album a few times before giving my final verdict. Who knows, maybe it’ll grow on me the second time around.

Monday, 9.05am I hate this album. Two times through is enough. I’m deleting it from my iPod as soon as I get home.

Monday, 10.30am What’s this fucking melody I have in my head?

- Information
- Released: 2010
- Label: Black Bards Entertainment
- Website: Northland MySpace
- Band
- Pau Murillo: vocals, guitar & jaw harp
- Alex Fernández: guitars
- Yolanda Gago: bass
- Pau Vazquez: violins
- Pol Lemaire: keyboards
- Dani Mateu: drums

- Tracklist
- 01. Prelude To Revenge
- 02. Revenge
- 03. Immortal Forest Song
- 04. The Old Town’s Inn
- 05. Lord Of The Flies
- 06. Everything Becomes Dust
- 07. Path To…
- 08. Northland
- 09. Distant Land
- 10. Where The Heroes Die
- 11. Withering Rose