### Torture Killer - Jari

#### 21/04/06 || Global Domination

This interview was done by ex-staffer Fishermane.

Introduction by Lord K Philipson: “Bla… bla… fanny-packs suck… Fishermane rules… so do Torture Killer… bla… bla… fuck off… bla kind of intro, you know?” Those words come directly from The Fish itself, and I think that makes for a good enough intro together with this, my own words: Torture Killer are from Finland. Finland lost the gold-medal to Sweden in the Olympics. That’s gotta fucken hurt big-ass muthafucken time.

Global Domination: Alright guys. Let’s start off strong here, since there’s a lot I want to find out about the band. First of all, what’s your favorite romantic comedy? Wasn’t John Candy great in “Cool Runnings”?

Jari: I haven’t seen that one but I’ll take your word on it if it´s any good… I’m not into romantic comedies that much, I’m more into “The Big Lebowski” kind of stuff. John Goodman is a fucking role model.

Yeah, especially in “Rosanne” and “King Ralph”. Now that we got that cleared up, let’s get the ass-kissing over with. Congratulations on “Swarm”, seriously, I was really impressed. Fantastic album. So as typical generic interview questions go, are you guys 100% satisfied with the results? Anything you’d like to change about it?

Glad you liked it, we’re very pleased with the album songwise. I think we took a big step forward writing these songs and the production works as well. I’m a fan of the old-school sound and I don’t think we got that completely, but we know what to fix next time in order to reach it. The sound right now isn’t bad at all, it’s distinctive and clear since Chris & Erik did a great job with the basic tracks we delivered to them. But like I said, I´d like to get more dirtiness and an overall darker sound next time. I´ve no doubt we’ll be able to do so in the future.

Future? BACK to the Future, haha. So you guys got an 8.5/10 score from our site, which basically means that you guys know how to play some serious metal, and since we’re as metal as it gets, that means a lot. How has the overall feedback been so far? Anybody bitched yet about how they claim that you guys are just a lame Six Feet Under clone? If so, they can go fuck themselves.

8.5 is very flattering and we´re glad you found it that good. Kinda surprised and disappointed though since I was expecting some hilarious bashing. The review you guys had on our first album was hilarious! You know we don´t care too much about that SFU copycat-tag, it´s pretty natural and understandable since they played a huge role on our sound, influence-wise, so I don´t take it as an insult at all. This is the style we want to go for and some people will like it and some will not. We WANT people to know which bands we were influenced by. We’ve never hid those and actually it would be pretty fucking disappointing if people didn´t think like that. I think we’ve added a few elements that may seem like small things but which make a big difference in the end, and I definitely think you could do a lot worse than we have with this album.

As long as you don’t end up sounding like U2 you’re fine with me. Now obviously, there’s gonna some Barnes-related questions here, so even though you must be fed up of answering them, try to bear with me. How did you guys end up hooking up with him? Did he participate in the songwriting process at all, or you guys just laid the shit down and gave him finalized tracks to work with? I think your site said he did contribute to some extent, so let us know how it went down…

I completely understand, we saw it coming and I don´t mind talking about Chris at all. All the attention he gets is a result of the hard-earned respect he’s gained throughout the years and I think it´s only fair to take full notice of him being a part of the band now. I have absolutely no problem with it. He caught the news somewhere about us having a line-up problem back in 2004 and as he was intrigued about the band name he checked us out. He appreciated the obvious influence his work had been to us and when he enjoyed the music he just thought it would be a cool idea to get in touch with these guys and offer his help, in that way returning back some of the respect. So one day, just totally out of nowhere, he dropped us an e-mail. We pretty much had all the music written down at that point but the thing we had to struggle with the most were the lyrics so probably the coolest thing about all this was when he agreed to participate in the actual album writing. So we just sent tapes back and forth and he ended up writing the lyrics for 6 out of the 10 songs. In addition, he did an amazing job with the vocal-arrangements and patterns on the demos we sent over. Honestly, I don´t think we’d have the material finished to this date without his help on the songwriting.

So then, how was it working with him? I’ve heard he was a dick, but then again I’ve also heard he was pretty down-to-earth and cool overall. Since my sources are garbage, give us a quick rundown on your experiences with Barnes, like if he’s as metal as you’d think he is and all that. I bet you he’s a close talker...

To us he´s been nothing but totally respectful, very polite, very encouraging and very supportive throughout the whole process. We never even had one argument with him and he was very down-to-earth and very easy to work with the whole time. I think we were definitely on the same level of thinking when it came to writing this kind of material, and the co-operation couldn´t have been easier. We’re so glad he ended up being like that, it would’ve been a shame to find out if he would be a total asshole, haha… Luckily that wasn’t the case.

Yeah, but I heard he cheats when he bowls… Fucking Barnes. So I understand you guys started out in 2002, how’s the death metal scene been treating you so far? How about the up’s and downs of being a rockstar? You know, like cashing big paychecks, hooking up with freaky groupies, answering shitty interviews for crazy websites?

It´s been very good to us so far, we´ve never had too much shit thrown at us and even the mags and venues here in Finland have been quite good which is not that obvious for a death metal band over here. I haven’t even cashed one check or hooked up with one groupie so far which is totally fucking ridiculous. Don’t these people know who the fuck I am!? Hahaha… I never thought I’d make a single buck, or even a fuck, playing in a death metal band so I’ll believe that when I see it. I bet it’s a fairytale that rockers feed us so we wouldn’t know what kind of losers they are.

Speaking of which, I wonder what’s up with The Eagles these days? “Hotel Arizona”, my ass. Those guys blow. So I haven’t heard anything from your first album, how do you guys think it compares to “Swarm”? I saw it on eBay for like 11-12$, is it purchase-worthy or should I just download it instead? Incidentally, my search for “Torture Killer” brought up 29 results on eBay, not bad. And only 4 of those were porn related.

You should try to get that album from the guy who reviewed it on the previous Global Domination site, haha… I still think it´s a decent death metal album, written in a very short period of time, very spontaneously, and I still like it a lot. Go buy it or download it, it´s up to you. “Swarm” is definitely stronger songwise but I still like the first one.

And 4 porn-related links to Torture Killer? I guess I´ll have to put the rest of the band under investigation to know if those fuckers are hiding something. If that appears to be true, then we might just have some free spots coming in the the line-up very shortly because I sure as hell have got nothing to do with it.

So aside from music (and possibly homemade porn), what do you guys do for a living? Are you planning to stay in the music-biz permanently, or you’re just having fun for now and will move on to bigger and better things over time?

I work in road-construction and I´m not building any dreams of making a living out of this band, I love playing in it but as for now it´s more like a hobby and nothing else. The drummer works in a warehouse, the bassplayer is going to some educational school and the other guitarplayer is working on house-maintenance, plumbing and shit like that. I´m sure they feel the same. We’re just enjoying what we have and we’ll see where it takes us, but trying to make a living with Torture Killer would be a total financial suicide.

Ok, finish off these 10 phrases:

10 years ago… I was in the army.

Video games are for people who… were left back a year or two.

Globalization is… torture.

I’d like to torture and then kill… the whole Swedish hockey team for what you guys did to us in the Olympics. ( Note by The Lord: It’s not our fault you guys suck. )

Keyboards and death metal… are not my thing, although some old-school bands had awesome intro’s done with keyboards. So did Nile.

Men who still choose to wear fanny-packs should be… sent to Sweden?

With 1 million $$$, I would buy… a hummer.

This interview is so great I want to… masturbate myself unconscious.

Finnish women are pretty damn… fat.

Mankind is… too big.

By the way, we’re pretty much half-way done here, are you bored yet? Do you enjoy answering interviews at all? I hope this isn’t causing you to miss any Finnish soap-opera’s or anything. While we’re on it, what are some of the best/worst questions you’ve had to answer in an interview, excluding mine of course?

Not at all, I actually find it cool to answer these kind of questions. “Tell me about the history of the band” -questions are irritating. Why do the editors think we have the “bio” section up on the website?!?!? I´m not missing any soap-opera’s no, haha… But if there would be a hockey game on you´d have to wait an hour or two.

Here are 10 bands/artists, go ahead and lay down some nice comments on them:

1. Cannibal Corpse: Bad-ass fucking death metal pioneers.

2. Suffocation: Same as the above.

3. Aborted: I prefer the old-school sound more than the up-to-date kind of style, but they fucken blast viciously. I still think the US-scene provides the best death metal bands these days, without a doubt.

4. The Smiths: The who???

5. Emperor: They got too avantgarde. I was heavily into the black metal stuff years back, but I sold all those BM cd´s because I wanted a more powerful sound, the thing you can´t beat about a death metal band.

6. Kate Bush: Not too familiar with her so I can’t comment…

7. Decapitated: They’re awesome. The first album has a few deadly death metal classics like the “Eye of Horus”.

8. Guns n Roses: I was more into Twisted Sister.

9. Opeth: Never understood why they’re so popular. Too artistic and avantgarde for my taste.

10. Zyklon: New-school death metal, it´s ok, but I prefer the American bands.

BONUS = INSERT A BAND OF YOUR CHOICE THAT DESERVES TO BE COMMENTED ON, EXCEPT WANG CHUN. ACTUALLY, I KIND OF LIKED THAT SONG “EVERYBODY HAVE FUN TONIGHT”, IT WAS PRETTY CATCHY. DID THEY EVEN HAVE ANY OTHER HIT-SONGS ASIDE FROM THAT? I DON’T REMEMBER ANY OTHERS OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD... ANYWAYS, GO AHEAD AND COMMENT ON ANY BAND EXCEPT THEM, BECAUSE WE ALREADY KNOW THEY RULE...

11. Godhate: The best goddamn death metal band ever to come out of Scandinavia. They´re the fucking best.

Ok, let’s switch things up a bit. What do you guys think happens when we die? Feel free to comment on religion in general while you’re at it.

I guess nothing happens, you just go to sleep and the worms will eat you. Kinda fucked up eh? I don´t believe in the afterlife or anything, but I do have total respect for the last resting place of a man. Grave-desecration is the worst kind of insult anyone can get, that´s personal. And if I´d get my hands on some pencilneck wannabe black metal mafia who would insult my friends’ or parents’ grave, I’d fucking rip his head off.

What about the current world situation, aren’t things pretty fucked up right now? Let us know what your outlook on the human race is, and how you would run things if you were in charge.

Dude, you’re getting too political, the world is overpopulated and all the problems are circling around that. You got parts of the world with people praising different gods and searching for conflicts and once that group gets too big we will be in a world of shit. So from that perspective, if I was the leader I’d be getting ready for that.

I’ll show you political… All 4 & a half inches of it! Ok, another fun interview question here. I give you 10 situations, you answer with a “Hell No!” or “Fuck yeah!”, or anything else you see fit. Has Torture Killer ever:

Gotten so drunk, you couldn’t walk on stage before a gig?

Hell no. That would be totally disrespectul towards the audience.

Thought about giving up music altogether before Chris joined the band?

Hell no. This is what I want to do and we would´ve figured something out.

Wanted to cover a Bon Jovi song?

Hell no.

Thought Chris Barnes was attractive?

Hahahahha… Nope.

Sure… Downloaded Six Feet Under songs without buying the album?

Hell yeah, I got all their own albums purchased but I wasn’t into that “Graveyard Classics” thing but I wanted to hear a track nevertheless.

Wanted this interview to end 10 questions ago?

Hell no, I dig this one.

Dressed up as pandas and alternated giving each other hugs after a rough day?

Hahahahah!!! Ummm… no?

Been arrested?

No.

Fought with each other?

We’ve had arguments but not fights.

Woke up one day and realized what a fucking killer band you were?

Hell no, I don´t think that would be a good idea at all. I´m very proud of the band in a healthy way though, and I think we’re making decent noise.

Alright, hypothetical situation. I meet all you guys in a bar, and decide to buy you all a drink. Who would order what, and try to somehow link that to their personality. For example, Lars Ulrich would probably ask me to get him a nice warm glass of milk, because he’s a little girl.

Hahaha… Well I guess Lars is a bit “special” if you know what I mean? I guess we´d all settle for a beer, the thing we all like drinking. In reality I don´t even drink hard liquor at all. I like to stay sharp, and drinking vodka or something strong would make me a drooling retard. I guess beer is the standard-drink we would all choose.

So what are some of your guys’ favourite songs that you’ve recorded, as in the ones that you’d pick for a new listener who’s never heard Torture Killer. In contrast, what about any particular riffs that you almost regret having recorded? Feel free to pick from all your material.

I think “Forever dead” would be the track I’d choose for people having their first listen, and I think that would turn out real good. I don´t regret having recorded any riffs so far, even though we had a song called “Fuck them when they bleed” from the first album on which the opening riff is a brutal rip-off from Obituary´s “By the light” from their “Back from the dead album”. But it sums up the “tribute attitude” of making music that we have. Right, haha.

So how do you feel about the metal scene as a whole right about now? What are the bands that you guys are really into, and would even like to tour with if it came down to it? Also, what bands need to get smacked a few times and kicked out of the game for good?

I’m not really into bashing bands. If I don’t like a band I won´t listen to them but I won’t hate them for doing it. I mostly listen to old-school material, the stuff that brought me into the more brutal side of music like Obituary, Bolt Thrower, some Napalm Death albums, Death, SFU, Monstrosity is my all time favourite, Deicide, Cannibal Corpse, Dying Fetus, Misery Index, Jungle Rot, Godhate, Demigod, Morpheus Descends, Brutality, Baphomet, Pestilence, Gorefest, Vader and stuff like that. I’d definitely choose our Finnish death metal brother Demigod and Sotajumala to tour with if I´d have a chance, and also the awesome Godhate from Sweden together with Misery Index from the States. We’re all good friends and I’m sure touring with them would be cool as hell.

Yeah, Misery Index is great, but Jason’s a damn commie. Now go ahead and throw in a few words on these 10 Finnish bands:

1. Amorphis: Love the first and the second album, turned lame after those…

2. Rotten Sound: I think it´s a one-man circus around the awesome drummer but I can´t say I enjoy the music too much. Not bad or anything I just like the heavy sound over the fast slapping.

3. HIM: Not my stuff at all, I can see why they’re popular though.

4. Children of Bodom: You can´t help but to admire the skillfull playing of those guys, but the music ain´t my stuff at all.

5. Finntroll: The now departed vocalist was a nice guy.

6. The 69 Eyes: The official clowns of the goth-rock scene.

7. Nightwish: Same as with HIM.

8. Impaled Nazarene: I respect those guys for keeping it heavy and metal but I don´t particularly like that style, even if the first two albums had killer-songs on them.

9. Ensiferium: Not my stuff.

10. Danny & Armi: Hahahah… Hyi helvetti!

Now, go ahead and pick out 5 of your all-time favourite albums ever, regardless of them being metal or not, and throw in some quick comments as to why they’re so important to you. Finally, list 2 of the reasons why you love me.

1. Obituary: “The end complete”. Probably the deadliest grooves and most brutal vocals ever recorded. Very dark and very heavy with awesome breakdowns and build-up’s.

2. Dying Fetus: “Killing on adrenaline”. The masterpiece of bashing and grooving death metal. The masters of build-up’s and breakdowns.

3. Deicide: “Serpents of the light”. The best Deicide-album. The vocals are the killing part and the riffs are just 100% death metal.

4. Monstrosity: “Millenium”. The most phenomenal death metal band and album of all times. Purely ingenious riffings and leads with devastating death metal tracks.

5. Obituary: “Cause of death”. All the ingredients of the perfect death metal album, I also love the James Murphy-leads which are immensely catchy, and the riffs are just pure massacre.

I would have to say I love you because you truly care about my feelings and seem to be a great wholesome individual. Everytime I talk to you my eyes light up and I can feel my heart start to pulsate gently. With every touch you caress my skin, and your sensual kisses taste like roses and honeysuckle… I wouldn’t be half the man I am today if it weren’t for me and for this, I thank you. Now hold my hand and let’s take off and soar through the clouds of love, and skies of justice…

( Note by Fishermane: Ok, I made up most of that part myself. Fuck off. )

To Finnish it off (har har), let us know what Torture Killer has in store for us. You guys just released a killer-album, you’re getting interviewed by the best metal-site out there, so what does the future hold for us?

We’re slowly starting to write music for the third album. We have some good stuff in store and I´m confident now that, with Chris giving his input on the entire material, it will be a full step forward with us. SFU is totally booked for 2006 but we’re just waiting our turn to get on tour with this awesome line-up.

Incidentally, I lied about 20 questions, there’s something else I want to ask you. So you guys start off by paying tribute to Six Feet Under, and then singer Chris Barnes joins you to record an album. Wasn’t that fucking amazing for you guys? I mean that must have been a serious honour to get to record with the very guy who got you to start playing… And incidentally, what are some of your favorite SFU songs? “Human Target” and “Nonexistance” are 2 of my favorite metal-songs, period.

It still feels very unreal. We’re totally honoured about the attention and the efforts he´s been giving us and I never thought we´d get so far with the band. It´s an immense honour beyond anything and we’re totally grateful for it. The 2 tracks you mentioned are amazing, man. I also love “The silent violence”, “Still alive”, “Feasting on the blood of the insane”, “Bonesaw”, “Torture Killer”, “Knife, gun, axe”, “Decomposition of the human race” and “Shadow of the reaper”, immensely.

Seriously, thanks for the time, and if I haven’t already mentioned it, I love you guys. “Swarm” was a killer-release, and I`m really looking forward to hearing from you guys again. Remember, if ever you guys come to Canada to play, swing by Montreal and we’ll grab a couple of drinks on me, ya hear? So take care boys, thanks for the time, and take this opportunity to thank anybody who deserves it, and don’t forget Global motherfucking Domination.

Thanks a lot for the cool interview and support, brother. Hope to see you at a TK-show one day with a pint of cool beer, thanks a lot man.

And by the way, what the fuck is up with Chris Barnes’ ear on that picture of him on the site? That’s one fucked up ear…

Hahaha… You got to ask him about it.

Cheers, fucker…