### Cumulo Nimbus: Totensonntag

#### 14/12/09 || Euthanatos

Cumulo Nimbus apparently play “Folk/Renaissance and Metal”. I normally like that, so I picked it up to review it. Nothing like giving something new a chance. Plus Cumulo Nimbus has something to do with clouds, and clouds are cool. They look like otherworldly pieces of gigantic cotton candy, I like that. I’m not happy about the band, though.

After an intro with the sound of rain, a goat starts singing in German. I swear to fucking god, this is not a man, it’s a goat. A goat by the name of Mathis Mandjolin. I had seen a cute chick in the band’s pic, and had hoped she would be the vocalist. Nope, Mr. Goat is what I get. So the goat bleats (did you know that goats bleat? That’s right. Dogs bark, cats meow, goats bleat. Now you know), and occasionally “Lady Doro”, not Doro Pesch, just “Lady Doro” does sing, though she’s not remotely as good as I had hoped. She is better than the goat though, but that’s not saying much. Goats can’t sing, you see. Goats bleat. Fucking stupid goat.

I can like bands singing in German. This one, for some reason, pisses me off. It’s probably because of the goat. A goat could sing in latin and it would probably sound deplorable. The scientific name for the goat is Capra aegagrus hircus, by the way. That’s latin. Doesn’t sound stupid, I know. Unless said by a goat.

This is Cumulo Nimbus’ 5th album. You’d think they’d have learned to do something interesting by now. Nope, the guitars are bland and lost in the mix, the drumming is generic and has a pretty bad sound, and even the flutes and violins, which usually can make anything at least bearable, are all over the place.

Yeah, I know most folk metal bands sound the same, guys, but ridiculously sticking to a formula without no content whatsoever is just not good enough. As a matter of fact, it’s laughable. Please quit your band and proceed to doing something worthwhile for humanity. Like herding goats.

Goats are cool. As long as they keep their fucking mouths shut.

The cover: OH, NO, THE HORSEMAN DEATH.

- Information
- Released: 2009
- Label: Black Bards
- Website: www.cumulo-nimbus.de
- Band
- Mathis Mandjolin: vocals, horn, zither, guitars
- Erik der Müllermeister: guitars, vocals, flutes
- Lady Doro: violin, vocals
- Pat Houdt: percussion, vocals
- Carolynn: flutes, vocals
- Käptn Köhler: bass

- Tracklist
- 01. Dämmerung
- 02. Carpe Noctem
- 03. Knochenmann
- 04. Totensonntag
- 05. Alte Mühle
- 06. Blutrote Segel
- 07. Irrfahrt
- 08. Flüssig Gold
- 09. Stadt Unter Wasser
- 10. Erbarmen
- 11. Aderlass