### Cephalic Carnage: Exploiting dysfunction

#### 31/10/08 || Daemonomania

Juvenile. And I ain’t talking about the Southern rapper whose shiny teeth get in the way of his pronunciation. C & C Grind Factory are like kids that just walked into the middle of a movie. They have no fucking context. Fuck. Not only did they miss Act I, but they were too stoned to pay much attention to Act III either.

Drugs have provided some great inspiration for lyrical content, writing in general, and unique uses for the breasts of hookers. But plenty of dumb and negative shit hath been borne from drugs as well. If you use too much heroin, you typically die. But you go out rockstar style. Take Alice In Chains’ “Dirt”. Heroin. Awesome. If you take too much LSD you go totally fucking crazy. Check out Skip Spence’s “Oar.” Hallucinogens. Insanity. If you smoke too much weed, however, you just start acting retarded. Callisthenics Caricature. Moronic. Hydrogrind.

So what you get here is a well-produced attempt at a grind/death/experimental jazzcorn/asshair album. There are full songs that are uninteresting followed by snippets of songs that appear to be riffs that couldn’t be formed into cohesive tracks. Props to them for not bothering to attempt it. The lyrics are about weed and mice in space and the grind bands that CC love. Then there’s of course the obnoxious series of samples. My favorite sample is at the end (not only because it is at the end), where you’re treated to a series of angry phone calls from a jilted drug dealer. He says something like, “put down the bong and pick up the motherfuckin’ phone!”. You sir have summed up the problem. May you release a logical and cohesive compact disc someday.

From what I understand Cephalopod Carriage have come a long way since then, but the taste “Exploiting” left in my mouth is so bad that no amount of roast beef sandwich gravy could wash it out. This album has forever biased me against grind, so deeply that the only two bands I can really stomach in the genre are Napalm Death and Rotten Sound. Both of whom eat these Curvaceous Cuntlips fucks for breakfast.

I’ll finish by misquoting Mr. Jovi:

Cephalic Carnage You were so lame You give grind A BAD NAME!

1 bong hit too many out of 10.

- Information
- Released: 2000
- Label: Relapse
- Website: Cephalic Carnage at Relapse
- Band
- Jawsh: vocals, bass
- Lenzig: vocals
- John: drums
- Steve: guitars
- Zac: guitars

- Tracklist
- 01. Hybrid
- 02. Driven to Insanity
- 03. Rehab
- 04. Observer to the Obliteration of Planet Earth
- 05. On Six
- 06. Gracias
- 07. Cryptosporidium
- 08. The Ballad of Moon
- 09. 9 Feet of Smoke
- 10. Warm Hand on a Cold Night (A Tale of Onesomes)
- 11. Invertus Indica (The Marijuana Convictions)
- 12. Molestandos Plantas Muertos!
- 13. Eradicate Authority
- 14. Paralyzed by Fear
- 15. Exploiting Dysfunction