### Sammath - Jan Kruitwagen

#### 17/09/10 || Daemonomania

Note by GD: No proof reading will be made. God help us all.

Here’s my review for little Dutch boyband Sammath’s “Triumph in hatred”, which will probably end up on this part of their website. Main man Jan Kruitwagen sent me a pretty cheerful email, taking my endless anti-BM jerkiness in stride. Seemed like a cool dude. So Daemo gracefully begged him to be interviewed for the Site of Most Metals on Intraweb. Do I know much about the group’s history, or really much about black metal in general? Nope. But this interview will serve as a platform to discuss my feelings about the subgenre (and the Netherlands).

GD: Hello Mr. Kruitwagen, and welcome to Global Domination’s VIP interview process. Have you visited our website prior to seeing the review for “Triumph in hatred”?

Jan: Hails and darkest greetings to thee, yes, I’d seen it a couple of times, once I was looking for one of those global domination cds. My google alert told me of your review.

What’d you think of the site overall, and my review in particular?

Pretty funny, you also seem to know what you are talking about, like a sort Beelzebub, or whatever the fuck that guys name is in the states who makes everyone look like a dick because he thinks black metal is gay. His interview questions are hilarious. You obviously didn’t get the CD at all, because you don’t like black metal, well, who cares. Opinions are like assholes. You did however make us laugh, that’s good enough. You gave us 6 out of 10, so i should be very pleased, thanks you lord KMANDREW.

So it appears you do just about everything when it comes to Sammath. Guitars, bass, vocals, lyrics, ALL the songwriting. Do you ever think, “Damn, I’d love to lay my black metal burden down and distribute the workload a bit”?

No, most other people suck, so I like to do it myself. In black metal you have two types of people, the ones who create it, mostly arrogant fucks who can’t work with other people, or the listeners, who these days are terribly gay. I can’t drum for shit so I was lucky enough to meet Koos when I was studying, drinking, in Nijmegen Holland. He is a complete dick, he actually breaks everything always, hasn’t been a Sammath gig without us having to pay the headliner for something broken. I started this in 94, and am still having a damn good time recording, coming up with riffs and lyrics. Democracy is great for running countires, but crap for bands.

Speaking of the band, looks like that Hanna van den Berg is kinda cute. You ever take over those “duties”? Heh heh heh.

She’s 20 and I’m 36, I’ll have to talk about that with her, and ask my wife if she’s ok about me banging the crap out of her. Hanna will probably kick me in the balls before I had the chance to lay my dirty hands on her. She’s very quick.

You’ve been around since 1994 and only released four full lengths. Has life kept you busy, or has the Dark One requested that you take it slow to perfect the delivery of his foul Arts?

Haha, the dark one I see every day in the toilet, he hasn’t spoken to me as yet. Although I have tried to summon his powers many a time. I don’t have rockstar ambitions and am busy enough with two kids and a caravan park that I own. Any bands that feel the need to release a album every year always sound uninsprining. And seeing as its black metal it would be a complete waste of time to think you can get famous, or you would have to look like a complete fool with lots of theatricals, no thanks. Or maybe write better music, but I refuse.

You own a caravan park, eh? Is it like a bunch of gypsies trading spices, carrying scimitars? Or is it like a trailer park here in the United States, where people simply trade reproductive fluids amongst their family members?

Haha, over here it’s very different. Its only open 6 months a year, we only have tourists. No gypsies or white trash. The only idiot running around here is me. We close in Oktober and open again April next year, so I spend most winters writing new material and spending time with my family. It’s a great way of life, theirs no boss to tell me what to do. And I spend most of my time outside.

Here’s a quick statement about the Netherlands. React to it as you will. Why is your shit so confusing? Netherlands, or Holland, populated by the DUTCH. That’s like saying I live in the U.S.A., also known as Imperialistville, and call myself a New Yorker.

That is indeed very fucked up, Holland is a Dutch province but Amsterdam is situated their, that probably dates back to fuck knows when (I should know, I was a history teacher) Holland was the main part of our country. The west of Holland always thinks itself better, even though these days it’s fucked, completely full and, if you want to get money out of a ATM machine you always have to wait twenty minutes.

Speaking of Nether-nether-land, according to Metal Archives you have approximately 1628 countrymates to compete with in the metal scene. Maybe some of them are inactive, but that still leaves a bunch. What challenge can Sammath offer to your fellow Dutchies?

We are one of the oldest still running black metal bands around, others are plain family men or they lost the spirit. I can’t imagine not being associated with black metal in some way. The Dutch are rich as fuck, so we can spend our time creating metal instead of searching for water, and hunting. A damn lot of good bands over here though. We are not the best band in the world, but we are one of the most agressive black metal warmachines.

Last of two Netherlands-based items, I promise. As a Brooklyn resident, I have you guys to thank for populating my part of NYC. No…sleep…to Breukelen! So yeah, thanks.

We should have sold it for a better price.

Besides God Dethroned, which rich and powerful group of Hollandian metal rockstars would you most like to be?

Asphyx was and is a damn good band. Also some good black metal like Salacious Gods, Cirith Gorgor, Fenris, Isthar. But they are not the gods for the Dutch metal gods are probably Severe Torture.

The next few questions will be in multiple choice format, since I’m taking a big test in a few months and have multiple choice on the brain. So just pick a letter, and give a brief explanation as to why you feel your answer is correct. Here’s an example:

Koos Bos is:

A) A character from a Turkish children’s show B) An Austrian polite reply when someone sneezes C) A huge mining company based in Yakutsk D) The drummer of a Dutch black metal band who enjoys breaking stuff E) The next Sacha Baron Cohen character (a bisexual European electronica enthusiast)

ANSWER: D, because Koos is the man with the blasting plan.

Which one of the following is most likely to be a song title on the next Sammath album?

A) Wolfpack Gangbang B) Drained ov Heterosexuality C) Triumph Over Hatred Using Hatred to Triumph D) Do the Sam-Math E) Fuck tha Haters (just kidding, we love you guys)

Probably D, but what the fuck, as you guys at Global Analnation gave System of a Down 9/10 points I should probably choose B.

If you have to describe your personal relationship to evil, would you say it is:

A) Healthy and affectionate B) Troubled and abusive C) Long-distance

A, I thrive on the dark one, I feel the power of Lord Satan within my soul. If I was a true black metal warrior I should probably choose B because most of those kids are troubled and confused.

The track “Interlude/Torment” is the best one on your most recent album because:

A) It doesn’t have so many of ze vocals B) It is a bit slower and features sweet riffs C) Less of that darn Koos hogging the spotlight with his blasting D) It is short E) The song title suggests that interludes are typically torment to endure, which is true

Haha, for most people who don’t like my vocals they al like interlude-torment, so A. And the other answers, D, Sammath songs are too long, well fuck you and only listen to the first 5 minutes, or three minutes if your one of those old fart death metal people who have strict rules as to song lengths (my guess is you are).

The following statement best describes the future of Sammath:

A) I will proudly hand the band down to my children B) Sammath will be consumed in a ball of green flame while performing their best live show ever C) We will stick around until 2014 and might release one more album before then D) Holland/The Netherlands/The Dutch people will finally recognize us as their most important musical export E) We will incorporate some more death metal into the mix and become listenable

C in al honesty, but I can’t see myself stopping now, I have enough ideas for two or more albums. E would be my best bet, but fuck that. I’m not in it for money, I’m in it because I think I’ll die without metal.

I realize we really haven’t talked much about your music in general, or black metal in particular. What elements in The Sammath sound would you say are distinctive from other BM bands, or do you guys stick to traditional methods of delivering the blasphemy?

I didn’t expect anything else, and this is better then most boring as fuck interviews I usually do. I would say the vocals, the mad solo guitars and the trigger free drum sound. Furthermore I don’t really do my best to try something new, metal is what it is and most people trying to be original, in black, thrash or death metal mostly end up sounding terribly gay. If you put on a black metal CD you can recognize our sound. And once again, I don’t give a fuck what most people think.

There are some pretty fucken killer solos throughout “Triumph”, which I assume to be your work. Tell us what type of guitar you use, gear, how often you listen to Yngwie, etc.

You didnt get a promo CD? The solos are by German/Mexican madman Magnus. He was promoting Sammath at the Under the Black Sun fest in Berlin and I was sleeping off a bad hangover when I was woken up by his screaming as he was selling CDs to some poor souls. After many beers I knew i had the right man for the job. Once the record label got me in contact with him again sometime later I went to Berlin a couple of times and even though he is a thrash metal maniac he does understand black metal, his solos are crazy and not used in black metal much.

I have a BC Rich and a combination of different amp models and pre sets, line 6 pod. On stage the sound guys always give me shit because its hard to keep the sound tight, on stage between songs you always hear my guitar buzzing and creating noise, hehe.

Whoa, almost forgot about the most important part of the interview, where you rate bands from 1 (worst) to 10 (best) and say which type of pizza topping they would be. For example:

Deicide: 7, pineapple in their early days, extra cheese these days

Now your turn:

I’d still give Deicide 9, very big influence. I hate pineapples, but their first albums are great, most later work doesn’t interest me much

Sammath: 11/10., we are the gods of underground black metal, all others are followers, we started black metal in 1974, we just didn’t release a demo

Sammath Naur (Polish or Dutch, your choice): Pretty fucking good band, a lot more theatrical then us, they are from Poland you lazy fuck 8/10.

Slick Rick: Don’t have a clue and I’m not going to search for it, with a name like that 3 /10. If he’s a male gigolo screwing his brains out for good cash, 9/10.

Behemoth: Never liked them, for me its like drinking Diet Coke or smoking light Marlboros, I don’t like watching men in dresses. Seems like the poor man is sick, they will be out of the picture from some time. They have done a lot though for extreme metal just for this they should get 9/10.

Watain(t): I had a bit of a row with Eric from this band sometime ago because he was supposed to perform before Sammath in 2002 at some festival, and he wanted to perform as late as possible to get high on the bill. Good band, right spirit 8/10.

Satan’s Host: Don’t know them

Simon and Garfvnkl: 10/10. All Dutch orgies with weed and cheap beer go hand in hand with these gods of extreme death metal

Though my review was douche-y, you responded pleasantly. Not common in the corpsepaint crew, that pleasantness. Do you attribute this to not being hateful enough, or being Dutch, or simply being content to know that some folks will just never “get” blackened metal chicken?

I’m a black metal fanatic, but I listen to thrash and death metal just as much, Coroner, Autopsy, Bestial Warlust. Most black metal folks do seem to overreact, but what can you do when a scene is full of losers and social morons.

I’m Dutch Australian, but having Dutch roots helps being laid back to mostly everything. As I’ve said before, who cares what people think. Most online e-zines, with some exceptions, yes this Glabel Domination too, are from people whose bands failed.

That about does ‘er. Thanks again for being a good sport. Let us know what’s coming up for the band, and bestow any final words of wisdom upon the GD hordes.

We are all going to be dead in 90 years, so drink up.

http://www.sammath.nl